I prefer the science fiction alternative: black holes are made by intelligent beings. The reason none of the numbers make sense with respect to dark matter and inflation is because life is actually actively altering the Universe.

Supermassive black holes accomplished two things: (i) they captured vast quantities of resources for future use; and (ii) they acted as gargantuan propulsion systems, thus allowing any captured matter (what we would refer to as a "galaxy") to be directed far, far, far away from any/all other captured matter.

And thus ended the great intergalactic war, which brought about the end of the homogeneous Universe, ensuring that no single civilization could ever start such a widespread conflict again. The distances would make it so.

Life was the big bang.

(I'll throw the /s and #notserious tags here; Poe's law and all that...)