1. This is incredibly common. Some of the most productive people you know probably struggle(d) with this. And this is important to keep in mind because if you think "there's something strange and unique wrong with me" your brain will dismiss standard insights and tools.
2. Dysfunctional perfectionism is a procrastination tactic. And procrastination is a standard human coping mechanism for anxiety. These are hard facts even if they don't _feel_ real. The source of anxiety for most knowledge workers with their baisc needs satisfied is often this: the grandiosity of unrealistic dreams that have calcified as expectations. This messes with your self-esteem too
3. Echoing vesuvianvenus's comment on this thread ('scale back the dream, scale up the grind'), this Tim Minchin commencement speech [0,1] has stayed with me for years.
> I never really had one of these big dreams. And so I advocate passionate dedication to the pursuit of short-term goals. Be micro-ambitious. Put your head down and work with pride on whatever is in front of you… you never know where you might end up. Just be aware that the next worthy pursuit will probably appear in your periphery.
[0]: https://genius.com/Tim-minchin-commencement-speech-and-unive...