I think the issue here is with the conception of "evil". The one shown in most media is incredibly flawed, and it is why the best villians are the ones that can actually argue their point, make you understand where they are coming from, and potentially even come to their side. People are not evil, they are simply acting as all humans do most of the time: in self preservation of some form. What makes a person appear "evil" is simply the situations they have ended up in and the accompanying beliefs and knowledge.

> but if kindly confronted with undeniable evidence of their harms they would immediately rationalize their actions with bullshit, and get as far from you as possible.

This is not meant to excuse that response, but I do want to point out that it is the rational and "easy" path of response. When people make ideas the core of their personality and survival, threats to those ideas are now personal threats. The path of coming to challenge and change those ideas is a hard road in most cases. It takes a very strong and brave person to change their mind on a core belief.

The better way IMO to approach it is to ensure people don't get caught in the position in the first place. Don't make beliefs the center of yourself, make values the center, and choose them carefully and with nuance. It allows you to change course on beliefs or ideas with much less pain and personal internal sacrifice. That needs to start early though, way before anyone at that table sat down for their meal. It's an education issue, an early one at that.