This will probably be an unpopular take, but 28 (your exact age) is "too old" to work in tech as a software engineer. Evidently, if it wasn't too old to work in tech, you wouldn't be asking this question in the first place. You even said that Paul Graham said not to hire engineers over 30. That gives you what? 2 years max to find a job, get settled in, and make a career out of it? Pshh. You'd obviously be behind others who started right out of college, as you mentioned.

This post sounds to me like sympathy-baiting. As if you want others to assuage your doubts. You won't get that from me. If you're willing to listen to Paul Graham, you should also be willing to listen to me - another stranger whom you've never met. So let me bite the bullet and be the first one here to discriminate against you just because of your age. YOU'RE TOO OLD! Hate to break it to you, but you will never be able to make a living doing programming as a software engineer. Just give it up right here and now.