"It is exhausting to have to argue the case for every minimal piece of good software design"

So don't do that. It's rarely worth it. I'm happy to bill $150 an hour while a couple of colleagues argue vehemently about directory structures on S3.

If you care that much about every minimal aspect of software design, then you need your own personal project. Landing on a team that all have the same good sense about software development with the ability to express that is just pure luck.