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It already does. That's what browser profiling is for.

So lets start by NOT adding more things that snitch.

Reframe it and it’s not so bad. It’s presenting a tamper evident ID card to a website that’s minted by the manufacturer of your device.

Your fake drivers license isn’t snitching on you when the bouncer looks at it.

It’s only snitching if you’re trying to get away with something and pretend you’re running unmodified Windows/macOS when you’re not.

Reframe it again, I'm running a modified OS that is free of spyware and respects my freedom, but the corporate bastards don't want that.