This is "saying the quiet part out loud" in academia. For engineering undergrad, your in-state university (ABET accredited) will usually be your best cost/benefit option (unless you're going to MIT, Stanford, or, for CS only, CMU). For grad school, I believe you'd want to think very carefully about the opportunity cost (and what you want your PhD for) before going anywhere outside of the top 20 (or even top 15) schools in your program. For a postdoc, where your opportunity cost is even higher, I think you need to be in the top 10 (or top 5) for it to be worth it.

There's no reason to do a postdoc at any school outside of the top 10 in your field unless, as you point out, you're working for an exceptionally well-regarded PI who is particularly going to be able to move your career in your desired path.

The people who do postdocs at these institutions are usually foreign, for whom a US postdoc is gold. Come to think of it, I can't recall ever interacting with a university postdoc who was a US citizen -- I've only worked for one "PI-generating PI", who happens to not like hiring postdocs.