I liked this one: "Linus Torvalds threatens to punish developers by putting Rust in the Linux Kernel"

https://lunduke.substack.com/p/linus-torvalds-threatens-to-p...

“I really didn’t want to have to do this,” stated Torvalds. “But you all screw around too much. Nothing seems to get through to you. Maybe a little time with Rust will teach you a lesson.”