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Comment by yosito | Hacker News Reader

> It’s extremely hard to be friends with your co-workers. You have to go out of your way to reach out and be available. Friendships don’t happen “organically” like they do in the office

Are people actually friends with their coworkers? I'm friendly with my coworkers, but I find actual friendship to be a conflict of interest. This is why I love working from coworking spaces. I can be friends with everyone I spend the whole day with, without worrying about it negatively impacting my work or vice versa.

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I feel similarly. I happen to work with a lady who, being honest, shouldn't be a programmer at all, and basically just creates messes. But she is the kindest person, and at meetups is probably one of the friendliest and most talkative people. And not in a fake sugar cover my ass way or anything, a real genuine person.

I wouldn't call us friends by any means, but man does it create this giant conflict of interest in my head still.

On a similar note, I also helped a friend get a job with me a few years back. He was completely checked out, to the point I was ashamed to have ever recommended him. So I probably won't do that again, either.

"Conflict of interest"?

Understandable, but still weird: Is it our job to enforce work quality and productivity from our colleagues? Has "The Man" made us turn on each other?

I found that managers (representing the business) are not primarily focussed on eliminating underperformers; instead they are trying to have work done within the constraints they have - recruiting and retaining competent employees being a major constraint in today's workplace. It is management itself that wants you to work around and cover for weaker colleagues. Your boss is likely operating on a macro level, trying to defend the entire team through the ups and down of corporate restructurings.

I have realized that it was my own ego acting up, wanting to be seen as 'better', and complaining about 'unfair' work distribution. The honourable path is to try and enable the weaker team members, there are always tickets they can handle right? If you carry a heavier load, make sure it is reflected in your salary accordingly.

I’ve made many friends from previous jobs I still chat and hang out with.

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