Put differently, I think one of the ways somebody goes from the "shiny/trendy and unstable" side to the "boring and stable stuff" side is by experiencing the operational pain of their choices. If the pain falls on others, will they still learn?
Of course, the way you talk about your job makes me wonder if you are already experiencing so many systemic/managerial issues that there the feedback loops are already pretty broken, so this one may not make a ton of practical difference.
Oncall is a scourge not because of the experience of technical problems, but because people already working full time have to arrange their lives outside of work around a second "oncall job". A job which occurs after hours, one out of every X weeks.
A dedicated, pure "Ops" night shift (perhaps in another time zone) would be more humane.
In my experience, this leads to design that pushes problems to outside of working hours.
"We don't need to fix that edge case, just have the off-hours ops team do a manual workaround every now and then."
Or "What does it matter that the deployment is error-prone? We can just schedule it with the off-hours ops team."
I think that depends on the seniority of the individual/team. In my experience, of course one can still learn.
To give you a real example: years ago one of our systems went down on a Sunday morning and our team had no oncall people. The infrastructure team was the one who fixed the issue (don't remember the exact underlaying issue, but it did make clear one aspect of our service we didn't properly: signal handling). Next morning the team wrote down a Jira issue to improve the way we handle signals. Ticket got prioritized very high and was fixed the very same day.
Now, what would have happened if the issue that Sunday morning was due to a bug in the software our team wrote? The same thing. The difference is that infra team would have no clue on how to fix the thing and would have to revert the service to a previous stable version. Would the business be fine with it? In our case, yeah. As a matter of fact, they didn't want to spend the extra money hiring ops people for each team to be on call. You see, if the business really cared, they would immediately have hired a software engineer willing to be on call... They just didn't care that much (and they couldn't force the current team to be oncall because our contracts didn't specify so and the average age in our team was around 35, and nobody wanted to be on call).
But how did the senior engineer learn to handle those situations in the first place?
Personally, if I get paged at 3am due to a bug, I'm going to fix it regardless of what the 'backlog' and 'prioritisation' and 'sprint goals' and 'feature roadmap' and 'product owner' say I should be doing.
But some would say I should not be bypassing the process in that way, and that the feedback loop of external stakeholders making requests to the product owner is more than sufficient.
My company goes with option 3 from the list, “It’s not part of the job outside business hours, but we might still try to reach you during those times.” and it's working fantastically for us.
One out of eight weeks my only job is handle alerts, incidents, and questions from other teams. I and my coworkers dedicate this time to burn down technical debt and to add documentation to the codebase. This keeps error rates quite low on its own but we combine this with a scheduled release cadence (3 times a week) and a reasonably sized QA team that tests the major feature flows of our product for each release (~1 QA per/ 25 engineers) and an ops team whose job is built around being available to rollback to a previous release.
Even though we're a large company with millions of DAU most teams get pinged out of working hours less than once a year. My experience here has really pushed me to the opinion that continuous delivery has been hugely destructive for most of the industry, eroding our pool of experienced engineers who can't be bothered to do on-call.
Work has had three out of hours pages in the last two years, all self resolved within a few minutes.