my take on dealerships is that you just have to know the maintenance schedule for your vehicle, and like you mention, understand how to gauge wear items yourself, because they will try to sell you services ahead of schedule, or on the "extreme use" schedule. as long as you pay attention and are willing to say no, dealerships are reasonable places to get your car serviced.

I've had bad luck with independent mechanics taking on jobs they weren't capable of doing properly and ruining a car in the past. Although it sounds like you had an honest one, independent mechanics aren't necessarily above selling you goods and services that you don't need, especially if you don't know the maintenance schedule or have maintenance records.