Or Uber, Lyft, Spotify, Netflix, food delivery sites, basically any website (according to the GP)
There is a pretty big difference in apps where you have an account and interact in real-time with service providers, notifications are a critical part of it, etc.
Browsing a list of events is nothing like it
What if it uses GPS and sorts the list by proximity to events? Does that make use of the phone’s capabilities?
You say it sarcastically, but yes, I do hold that view. Our current norms are absurd.