I don't know what software you are referring to. But with the IVI, which is what users interact with, the difference is night and day.

Most cars have shitty, laggy IVI that will get no meaningful updates. You are on many cases almost forced to use Apple/Android Car.

Teslas give you more of an Apple treatment. You will receive meaningful updates for years. It is mostly fluid and good looking. It is exciting for the people looking for the latest gimmick, the same way people look forward to iOS 15 or whatever.