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I'm not sure there was any one thing.

I will say there was a big negative - teaching that society is a meritocracy and to have integrity. I would be much more successful and happy if they told me how crooked society really is.

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Society is not a pure meritocracy, but I think it’s more merit-based than random. And people have agency over their success. This is despite society having crooked elements.

It seems to me that it's more about luck, chronyism, backroom deals, and backstabbing than it is about merit. One's abilities only go so far, then you become victim to politics.

Politics is its own skillset in which merit plays a role, no?

The "one percent" that matters most is very much not about ability. Merit is just another thing that that class buys.

But then would you be a happier person? OP asked about happiness, not just success

Probably. It's less of a let down to know the truth rather than be fed a fantasy.

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