Desperation built this world. It's the number one motivator of life.
Desperation mixed with insecurity can seem like depression, but if you're really depressed, out of money and with limited prospects. It's time to go ask someone for help.
Alternative ideas: Can you make money on bug bounties? Can you apply to local universities for tutoring? Can you do some gig work just to chip away at the bills?
Most of our lives are spent spinning our wheels. What separates us from or former selves is how we prepare for take off.