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how would an open federated one be less soul crushing though? this is not me trying to undermine you with a passive aggressive question. I would like to hear about this idea.

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Agreed. I don't really see the current apps as flexing some sort of monopolistic power to give you shittier dates. Their solution to the classic problem of asymmetric supply/demand regarding hot/not hot people is for them to take a fee.

Actually match corp owns idk at the moment but something like 90% of dating apps and sites. 100% of the popular ones so they are a monopoly.

There has been some decent research highly suggesting match optimizes for failure of its customers. It makes sense since in their biz a happy customer us no longer a customer.

I could see that happening (whether on purpose or even inadvertently) but haven't seen any such literature myself. Do you have some references (asking earnestly)?

I've read enough people say that these apps are "soul crushing" and people explain that sadly this characteristic is baked into the algorithms in order to a)make the apps/games addictive and b) keep people engaged, c)make people, especially men, think that there's hope - but only if they sign up for a subscription.

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