Self-improvement is great, but also be aware that this is a systemic issue. A great many men (and possibly women?) today feel the same way:
https://old.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/z60i2x/what_is_the_...
https://old.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/z6m1g6/there_is_a_m...
So just be aware that this is not a personal failing of yours, it seems like more of a norm.