That said, it's super hard to experiment on kids without getting in trouble :-). As a parent unfortunately you have to pick a path. My eldest had the tendency to only learn through experiencing the negative side effects of choices directly, called "natural consequences" in parenting books from the turn of the century. That led my wife and I to help get those experiences in early before they could do real harm and to try to give experience with things not going well, and then going back and taking a different route and experiencing things going better. Was that what helped them become functional adults in college? Or was it my wife insisting they did their own laundry once they turned 10? Three times a week one of them was asked to prepare dinner for the family once they were old enough to reach all of the appliances and use kitchen utensils with proper care.
You don't get multiple universes to try out different techniques to find the best one. Talking with other parents of similarly aged kids helps and is reasonably cathartic. Exposure to lots of different choices helps surface things that are similar and things that are different.
Conflict management is something else entirely. Both my and my wife's family of origin were "conflict avoiders," which really had a hard time growing beyond their specific complexes. When we found ourselves doing that with each other we recognized it and got some help with working through it. Our kids benefited by our modeling and all of them have remarked at one time or another that their friends have said something positive about their ability to negotiate touchy subjects. I count that as a win.
Bottom line is that parenting is a tough job and its good to seek out advice.