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So how would you follow up in this situation when its you asking for help? Would you just say no and ask someone else, or try to figure the thing out by yourself?

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I'm not saying reaching out for help if needed is bad - rather that an unscheduled call is a huge context switch. Async is preferable.

For me, async conversations are a continuous drain on my attention over a longer period, rather than a call which I can devote 100% of my attention to for a shorter period and then get back to giving 100% of my attention to other things.

Imo when you go with async communication you pay the cost of that context switch over and over, with interest.

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