So, still like a 100x improvement in the areas you're concerned with, compared to using any standard programming language (to either re-implement the same stuff or use third-party libraries)?
I mean footguns in "Multiplication with multi-dimensional arrays"? That's a problem with Mathematica as opposed to what? Implementing it yourself? Using a third party library for that (that you have to also find and assess it's doing the right thing - which apparently numpy also doesn't as you say). Another specialized tool (and wouldn't that just have it's own footguns)?
If you just said "it has its set of caveats that you need to be careful about" that would be understandable.
But your wording/tone implies that Mathematica is somehow worse, and using it is (your words) "a terrible idea". So, what are those wonderful alternatives that don't have the same and much worse issues?