I avoided social situations all my life because I was (and still am) afraid of rejection. I minimized the amount of time I socialized with people because I felt inherently different, that I didn't belong, that somehow my presence was offensive/offending to people - likely due to the constant emotional manipulation and abuse from both my parents growing up.
After going to therapy for almost a decade and finally getting the courage to leave my abusive family, I feel like the "social" parts of my brain that should have developed years ago have now atrophied/cemented themselves into place, unable to experience the emotions, unable to mentally process social cues and understand the "hidden meaning" the things people say.
I don't feel like the label "incel" or "volcel" applies to me, I feel like I'm stuck in this persistent state of limbo where I know I could might be in a relationship if I tried, but why bother if it's likely just going to end up in regret/rejection/heartbreak/etc? The pros/cons don't seem to weigh out - but then again, how would I know if I've never been in a relationship? Doesn't help that I feel like I'm scared of women for some reason either.
I'm incredibly embarrassed to admit I've never been on a date of any kind or talked with women my age in any capacity other than small talk. It kills me inside every day I look at myself and scream internally at why and how I feel so broken socially and mentally. Doesn't help now that the hairline's receding.
I know this doesn't really relate to the authors' article at all, just looking to see if anybody else feels this way or have felt this way. I think people in the tech industry can relate to it more considering I'm sure a lot of people here have been glued to their computers like I have for long periods of their lives.
Online dating doesn't make things easier either...