Stop. Turn right. Take your shoes off. Accept this tube into your sphincter. Don't gag. Look into this camera.

In speaking about having no control, I was actually just referring to the loss of bodily autonomy at TSA security checkpoints, not the danger of a plane crash.

Also, to your specific question, while correlation between [1. sitting at a bar, smoking a cigarette, 2. imminent death] is low, and correlation between [1. hospital where you can't drink or smoke, 2. dying] is quite high, that was actually the humorous part of my critique.

There just happens to be a weak correlation between people who are fervent readers of HN and those likely to get my sense of humor.