Just because
you personally dislike city living, does not mean that the massive number of people who love cities are gaslighting.
People left cities during the pandemic because it was a pandemic. This isn't complicated to unpack, there's no secret motivations here. When there's a highly contagious disease around for a long time, all of the benefits of cities temporarily either closed or became a health risk: public transit, cultural institutions, restaurants, proximity to workplaces, etc. And meanwhile all the drawbacks to cities were amplified: smaller living quarters, higher population density, less access to private outdoor space, harder to have your own car.
In many major US cities, people moved back in droves over the past couple years. Rents soared and rental vacancy rates plummeted. That doesn't line up with your statements at all.
SF may well be in a death spiral, but nothing about this situation can be applied to all cities in general!