It won't make everyone equally useless, but it will lead to even less equitable outcomes. Per the article, parents who value education will either teach math to their kids themselves or hire private tutors. Kids without that luxury effectively get robbed by the state in the name of equity.
That is the apparent goal of “equity” programs.
Note that this joke is made, but better, in TFA. With an accompanying (non-original) graphic.
It's not a joke and there's nothing funny about it.
Exactly, this is the only way to make everyone equal. Equally bad.