You find this "Women don't have this problem! They can have a relationship whenever they want" sentiment in so many conversations on Hacker News, and it's so unempathetic.

The premise is not true for many women. And even if it were, it's not necessarily any easier to get attention from someone you are interested in yourself. And women have to deal with social anxiety, fears of making themselves vulnerable, self-confidence, body image, etc. around pursuing or initiating relationships just as anyone.

I think this is based in people misreading dating app metrics or something, and completely neglects trying to imagine what life is like for the person.