Did the Federal Reserve promise me that cash was always "safe, fast and convenient?" Are they getting a cut of every dollar I spend?

I'm fine if a payment method is escrow-free and non-reversible, and I'm told that upfront. Oddly enough, that's like a rare luxury. Even Zelle is only half that: authorized payments are never reversed (i.e. they don't act as an escrow), but unauthorized ones (hacked account, etc) can be.

This is posted somewhere, but I also tested it myself. Previous landlord had stolen my security deposit. I went to my Chase branch and called several different numbers trying to reverse the final month's rent, which had been Zelle'd. After initially getting the half-truth that payments cannot be reversed, I found the right person who asked sternly if the payment was unauthorized, saying I could reverse it if it was. I had to say no. So no dice, I had to go sue the landlord instead.