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Now I find myself in my mid 40’s I don’t have a single friend who I’d feel comfortable phoning/messaging.

My fault, I did nothing to foster friendships and made family my number one priority.

It’s not an issue for me now, I have a great wife and 4 kids but I do wonder how I will feel in 20, 30 years time.

Never say never. If you care that much I have seen quite a few 40+ meetups specifically for people in your situation.

Now the 20's/early 30's, I could use some advice there. IDK where they are.

If you think you can make deep friends when you're 40+ with 4 kids, you either don't have to work for a living and your wife does 90% of the work with children or you don't understand what deep friendship means.

>you don't understand what deep friendship means.

Given that I nor the GP ever mentioned "deep" friendships, I probably don't understand your definition, no.

I'm simply saying there are places to meet other people 40+. Whether it becomes "deep" or not depends on both your and the recipient's dedication to maintaining such a relationship. And since you can't control the recipient, it's basically a crapshoot. But there's nothing wrong with more casual frienships.

You're winning, my friend.

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