It's the sort of thing that immediately escalates a situation, and in reality when the card is played it either breaks the trust, or the trust has already been broken.
If it's a trivial thing like send an email or some small ask then I wouldn't necessarily expect it to be in writing.
For any non-trivial task I'd expect it to be in writing, even from my manager. Reason for me is that where I work I don't only report to my manager when it comes to how my time is used, but other workstreams and projects, etc.
If I'm busy working on a task for you that is undocumented, then all these other workstreams will wonder what the fuck I'm doing with my time, or may question whether its more important than other tasks. Obviously this is industry specific, since I don't actually work directly with my manager on any projects and probably never will.
From my perspective, my manager has failed or is lazy if they fail to put their non-trivial tasks in writing.
A possibility is that asking for a written version of the task got the manager to start thinking about the fact that they were asking for something that would be hard to articulate exactly, which revealed some hidden complexity in the request. But I guess that would be asked in a fashion more along the lines of “let’s work out the details asynchronously.”
There was resentment yes, but I did trust them!
You wouldn’t verbally describe a structure to a builder, and then accuse them of not trusting you when they ask to see a blueprint.