I trust that the billions of women world 'round who practice this know in their heart-of-hearts that they are not being dominated by adopting their husband's last name. Yours is something of an extreme point of view, IMO.
The point is not that women adopting their husband's names is misogynistic but rather that the need to excuse women who don't is misogynistic.
A wife taking the husband's name is still the norm here. I think that some people feel they need to explain why they didn't so that other (more judgmental) people don't just label them as "weird" or "femi-nazis" or any of the other disparaging labels that people put on others when they don't have the same opinions and ideals. I think this change is a slow process and will not have 100% acceptance. But I have no doubt that the time will come when that choice will no longer be questioned.