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Oh so that's why there's a company-wide kill switch on account.jetbrains.com that requires an admin to explicitly opt-in to AI features.

Do any of you even use the stuff you complain about?

There is now. That was not there day 1

If by day 1 you mean the day it was publicly available out of beta, it was there day one.

There absolutely was on day 1, which is the day I tried to enable it and ran into a brick wall because my employer refuses to enable it.

Can confirm, tried to enable it day 1, got denied, because the Organisation Admin has to enable it.