>If you paid a fee for priority Uber that let you jump the queue it'd be closer to not a bribe.
Do you feel the same way about how offering a better price on craigslist gets you counterparties faster? eg. if the going price for a phone is $300, and you list at $250, you're going to get people messaging you sooner because you essentially "jumped the queue" for everyone who's looking to buy a phone.