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So why are the tires super wide on Teslas, with consequently high rolling resistance?

The door handle is a gimmick, afaict, with so much other low hanging fruit in the design.

Because the cars are heavy and with have high torque. They need the extra grip to have those insanely low 0-60 times.

No one wants an anaemic Tesla either.

I would much rather drive an anemic Tesla - skinny cheaper tires, lighter so easier to change myself.