Well, in the "advice-industrial complex" as the OP correctly identifies it, the OP being in the advice business (sort of) himself, has two choices: join the inflationary 'self-help, you can do it' camp and have a hard time getting himself remarked from the crowd, or join the tried and true 'contrarian' camp, yielding much better results for a minority who wants to hear and feel 'different'.
Truth is that there's no one true way. Statistically there will be people who get second chances and people who don't. My guess is that the latter crwod gets even more bitter and depressed hearing all "it will get better, you will overcome the hurdles".