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Comment by aculver | Hacker News Reader

Make that N=2. This post is very, very similar to my own experience after launching my "startup on the side" last year (http://www.limelightapp.com/) and the advice closely parallels what I'd give to others as well.

>> Get your spouse or SO's buy-in. Until that happens, I'd suggest not going forward.

Agree completely. I think one key to gaining my wife's incredible support was the understanding we both had that Limelight came after her and the kids. Once we had that discussion, she made time for me to work on it once the kids were in bed.

>> Something has to give, and it's usually your hobbies.

I miss Japanese. :-(

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> I miss Japanese. :-(

がんばって！

(I assume the downvoter wants a translation? It means "do your best!" [on your startup])

Do either you or the poster have advice regarding single parenting + full time job + nights/weekends-style startup? Possible? Was unclear if you were saying that spouse + support = okay, or just if spouse, then support = okay. Do you rely on the presence of a spouse who happens to be supporting to be able to even get the part time priority on the list below the rung to family?

I just meant, if you have a spouse, then you need their support. If you don't have a spouse, I think you can still pull it off, but as I have never done a startup under those circumstances, any advice I'd give would be purely speculative. Practically speaking, you'd still have nights and weekends to work on your startup.

Are you doing a startup with a cofounder? I'd be worried, from an emotional standpoint, about doing a startup under those conditions without any moral support (from either a spouse or cofounder). Everyone is different but the dark secret of startup life (especially bootstrapped on the side) is that it's tough, and you can get depressed easily for a number of reasons. Having someone in the trenches with you is a great help, emotionally.

That's a tough question. To me, it seems like it would come down to social life (including dating) and the startup. I know that when my wife is out of town, once the kids are asleep, I've got almost a full work day's worth of uninterrupted time to work. But, I'm free from worry about socializing.

I'm a single parent (full & sole custody). You said "single parenting + full time job + nights/weekends-style startup"... I mean I'm really, really not a helicopter parent; I have a life apart from raising my kid. That being said I think a single parent who's working full-time AND doing a "nights/weekends startup" would wind up short-changing SOMETHING.

I can't imagine there would be any satisfaction to be had in that kind of stretching.

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