The problem is that you have little control into when one of those people infiltrate the board. Most HOAs start with no issue. It is only after someone new joins that the rule enforcement becomes insane or the big pot of money vanishes.
Yup. I can’t imagine what an HOA would need to be doing to meet monthly, let alone delegate decision making to a board.
The latter is simply incorrect. Condo associations and co-op boards are separate creatures, in part due to there being an existential necessity to their existing. (You can't have people dismantling structural members their unit abuts.)
HOAs are far more voluntary in nature. That said, I agree that we need a better framework for distinguishing those functioning as direct democracies from those where an elected board gets to appoint itself powers.