Does Divorce Make You Hotter?
thefp.com
thefp.com
Knowing what went wrong to cause your first marriage to break up can mean that your second marriage lasts a very long time. If you are willing to learn from your mistakes.
Have given this advice to >10 people in my circle who have gone through a divorce. In my early 40s, the number of couples I know still married is rapidly dwindling.
I wonder what the rate of children are for second and 3rd marriages. Probably low, as even first marriages rarely produce more than 1 these days.
That's sarcastic, but it seems pretty weird to think your opinion applies so clearly to every situation other folks might find themselves in.
How many of the people you advised died happy that they listened to you?
Sometimes you’re lucky, sometimes you’re not. That’s it. If you feel lucky, enjoy it until you’re not. When the luck runs out, there will be pain. Maybe the luck doesn’t run out, but the data should make you cautious and take pause considering the risk involved. I don’t conjure the failure rates, I simply observe them and the outcomes. You can do everything right and the other person is still out the door, through no fault of your own. People grow and/or change, sometimes not together.
You can love and be with someone just fine without a marriage. I know of many relationships that are just that. Being married doesn’t make it more real or special, nor will it keep someone around whose investment in the relationship has dropped to zero.
I have yet to have someone be disappointed with the advice I’ve given, so I keep providing it, iterating whenever possible to help others optimize for happiness and favorable life outcomes.
If you keep repeating the same behaviour, you're never going to get a different outcome.
In my first marriage, we argued and fought practically every day. I felt I had 'to win' otherwise 'I would lose'. That's a short cut to failure and divorce.
In my second marriage, my policy was to cut off any argument at the source. My second wife was of the same opinion. In 36 years together, and 32 years of marriage, we never had a full-blown argument. Terse words, yes. But an argument was never permitted by either of us. I lost her last week.