Why do you think you have to have a “a solid body of work or some kind of reputation” to have a value?
Have you spoken to someone about this, like a therapist? (P.s. I’ve been through something similar)
Have you spoken to someone about this, like a therapist? (P.s. I’ve been through something similar)
Usually when I see someone who has mental health challenges on HN my advice is something like: "go see your primary care physician and see if you can get an antidepressant prescription, do as much cardio exercise as you can, develop your social supports" That's because frequently I can point out enough symptoms of depression to justify the dx. In this case I can't quite.
The word "delusion" though bothers me and, the OP is using it accurately, it could be a sign of something more serious (though I'd think most delusional people would not describe themselves as suffering from delusions; when I was under the influence of a system of delusions I was insufferable and it took about six weeks of tough love from a close friend and some misadventures right out of Don Quixote for me to snap out of it)
In this case I'd recommend talk therapy. In 2024 waiting lists are long. A close associate of mine started therapy recently and took about three months to get an appointment, so he should start now. He can probably get something in person but there are also online services like BetterHelp.
The OP might still want to see their PCP, it is not bad to get his thyroid checked and might still want to try some medication. If he does he should expect to have several contacts (maybe over the phone) with his doc to vary the dose and maybe try something different. In his case I'd want to watch carefully in case symptoms got worse. A primary care doc can also give a referral to a talk therapist (could be a psychologist, social worker, pastoral counselor, ...) or to a psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner (expert in prescribing medications for people with severe mental health issues)
Yeah I've had therapy. My mental health is a ton better than it used to be. It's how I could even be pursuing the things I'm pursuing now. It just gets especially hard when I'm trying to make things happen and it feels like there's so much holding me back.
This is surprising to me. I don’t want to presume but I wonder if part of the pain you’re feeling is induced by the environment you’re in.