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How can we expect kids to learn to read a language that's taken an alphabet and created a poor woman's logogram out of it?

wi hæv ɔl ðə tulz wi nid tə tɝn ˈɪŋɡlɪʃ ˈɪntu ə ˈlæŋɡwɪdʒ wʌn kæn rid wɪðˈaʊt ˈnidɪŋ fɔr jɪrz ˈtutərɪŋ. jɛt wi doʊnt bɪˈkəz ɪd bi tu mʌtʃ wɝk.

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see also https://www.shavian.info

(the Achilles heel: any phonetically spelled language can only be correct for at most one dialect!)

Unless each spoken dialect corresponds to a matching written dialect. But that just sounds like an even messier system than modern english.

That's an argument for why we should all use Chinese instead.

You can always phonetically spell in the dialect. Which Finnish does often. So if you have a dialect you write it out phonetically. There might be slight deviation from standard phonetics(some vowel variations), but the dialect does get rather close.

In the end, maybe it is inherently wrong take that same word in different dialects is the same word. Usually they are close enough to be relatively intelligible.

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