I've learnt the hard way that there are protocols from getting back on your feet from the shittiest shit in your life. There are communities of people with MUCH SEVERE problems.
It's also in books, read "PSYCHEDELIC OUTLAWS: The Movement Revolutionizing Modern Medicine" by Joanna Kempner. (there is also audiobook). There are communities, really really good communities that will help you to get back on your feet again, quickly, no b/s (I'm a bit hesitant to share the links, but you can always reach out). This really works, verified.
If you're suicidal, call 988. Also, I can send you a link to a protocol that helped many people with a very good reviews. I discovered it by accident, and there is a community of people who implemented that. Once you have all the things, the help is so quick, in a week you gonna enjoy life again.