I believe you :) Simply refusing to play "keep up with the Joneses", seems to me can make the difference between being able to buy a home or not. Albeit it can take some inner confidence. I can't remember anyone actually asking me "why do you drive such a s*** car?", but they probably think it. ;) The key thing is not to care. Caveats - (1) this doesn't solve the problem if due to friends and family network you feel a need to live somewhere extortionate e:g London, NY, SF etc (although OTOH all of those have cheaper places 2 hr train ride away) (2) In USA, people can get randomly saddled with huge healthcare bills.