I'm not used to putting effort into friendships, so it does sound like an unwelcome task.
And it sounds phony, since I have never put effort before. If I have to put effort then am I not faking it?
And it sounds phony, since I have never put effort before. If I have to put effort then am I not faking it?
Pretty much every relationship I have "doesn't come natural." I need to put conscious effort into every one.
I have also been involved in an organization, for most of my adult life, that has been instrumental, in helping to force me to have relationships with others, and it has taught me to be a good friend, and has given me good friends.
I'm not really into "transactional" relationships. In many cases, the extent of our relationship is only where we need to work with each other. I don't need to be their buddy, but, in the context of our work, I have found that it helps me to develop a true interest in the other person.
In my experience, I have realized that I'm actually a "people person." I really like people, and have found great utility, in ignoring my prejudices, and actually finding out a lot about the others in my life.
In what way exactly?
It's made me a good coder, but has made my relationships challenging.
It's really a long story, and one that others have told, far better than I can.