Ask HN: You've got a million dollars. What do you do?

You're an ordinary 40 year old software engineer in a major US city, making six figures by writing code that you know creates more problems than it solves. Your performance reviews read like a predictable template of strengths and weaknesses, delivered by an Engineering Manager who insists your company will revolutionize the way the world does X and oh how he misses writing code. You don’t buy any of it. Honestly, you’re hoping — for his own sake — that neither does he. You remember that programming used to be all the fun, but you don’t remember how that transformed into this. It doesn’t matter. You really need the six figures. It doesn’t even cross your mind to change the company — you’ve had enough jobs at this point to know they are all, in a nutshell, more of the same.

You live in a cookie-cutter house in a good suburban neighborhood with a child and a loving wife. Between your mortgage, two cars, restaurants, and some hobbies, your total cost of living is about $12,000/mo. During weekdays you build shareholder value. During weekends, holidays, and “unlimited vacation”, you enjoy life.

You’re cleaning out your email inbox on a Sunday afternoon and stumble upon an old confirmation for a cryptocurrency purchase from years ago. You barely remember buying it, but out of curiosity, you log into the account. To your shock, the balance has ballooned to over a million dollars — $1,157,329.

What do you do?

Asking for a friend.