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Comment by yock | Hacker News Reader

* "My maternity leave will be a few weeks long and I'll work throughout it,"*

I made some remarks here a few weeks ago (on another article about Mayer) regarding her views on working long hours that were not well received. I'd like for this remark to service as a prime exhibit of why I have such a distaste for people who worship their work.

My wife and I were blessed with our first child last October. My employer was kind enough to supplement my paid vacation with a few extra days so I could enjoy those first few weeks just that much more. Turn that around and insist on cutting that time short AND pledging to work through it anyway? You're kidding, right? Her child isn't yet born and she's already two steps out of his or her life.

I sincerely hope the remainder of her pregnancy and delivery does much to change her mind about the significance of this person who is about to enter her life.

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My wife and I had our first child at the end of April, and the first few weeks of her life we had absolutely 0 time outside of caring for her and basic care/hygiene for ourselves. Absolutely nothing can prepare you for taking care of a newborn. It's not like taking care of a puppy, it's a 100% 24/7 job where almost every waking moment is dedicated to making sure the baby is comforted, well-fed, well-slept, clean and cared for. I honestly have no idea how Marissa Mayer expects to do any work during her short maternity leave, that is unless 1) her husband takes care of the baby 99% of the time, 2) they have a live-in nanny to actually take care of the baby, 3) she elects not to breast feed (which you do every 2-3 hours for a newborn) and bottle feeds instead, or 4) she will open her laptop when the baby is sleeping, which is a bad idea because you're supposed to sleep when the baby sleeps or else you become sleep deprived extremely quickly.

And so what if it was all of those first three? Though it is still a huge stigma, many fathers take on primary care of their children. Many people who can afford to, hire someone to help care for their children... most two income families at least use daycare. And many women do not breast feed for any number of reasons. But being in the news for being picked to turn Yahoo around makes her wrong for possibly doing what many, many families have been doing for years?

Sweden's attempt at equality is to instead of making women less prone to take leave a pregnancy by making them work through it (which feels inhumane), is to make men more likely to also take leave by granting couples a shared "parental leave" instead of just maternity leave.

From Wikipedia: "To encourage greater paternal involvement in child-rearing, a minimum of 2 months out of the 16 is required to be used by the "minority" parent, in practice usually the father, and some Swedish political parties on the political left argue for legislation to oblige families to divide the 16 months equally between both parents"

You made your choice, she is making hers. I don't think she's implied that this is what others (including Yahoo employees) should do. Why would you disparage her personal decision, when you'd (presumably) want people to respect your decision to take a few more days off?

He's probably disparaging her personal decision because he believes her personal decision is bad for her child. People are under no obligation to respect lifestyle decisions they believe are incorrect.

This is how CEOs of fortune 500 companies act almost as a rule. It's the flipside of the insane pay.

I can see many new male CEOs in the same position taking the exact same approach to any small surgery.

Childbirth is %1 about the labor, and 99% about those first few weeks.

Life isn't just kids. I know American society is obsessed with them, but other people have other priorities. You might have a better relationship than she will, or she might actually have a better one than you. I know no one bitches about Larry Page's "only 3 days off" when his wife gives birth. Why should we be bitching about Mayer not taking more time? That child will have more caretakers, experts, and opportunity available to it than 99.5% of all American children. Don't worry about it.

If MM performs very strongly in the CEO role, she will do more for her descendants as far as pushing half the human race into the candidate pool for leadership positions across the western world. We're leaving so much talent and perspective on the table by only picking white male leaders.

no child left behind - but plenty of children abandoned by their parents in the pursuit of the all-mighty career.

Why are you making her wrong for her own deeply personal decisions?

He is merely suggesting it is not the optimum choice.

I nearly laughed when the article compared having a kid to getting sick or being in an accident. But I suppose male CEOs neglect their families too.

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