A Ford executive who kept score of colleagues' verbal flubs
wsj.com
wsj.com
It started when we were in a meeting with an executive (who was a wonderful man) who -- due to nerves -- used the filler phrase "ya know" about twice a sentence -- like someone who's nervous might use the filler word "um" or "uh."
When the meeting was over, I'd joked that he'd said "ya know" three times in the same sentence and without missing a beat he said "541, I counted"[0]. He went on to explain that when someone repeats a word/phrase, especially if it's a word that's used "to sound intelligent", he can't help but count.
Incidentally, despite having no reason to be suspicious[1], I didn't believe him and being in an IT department with its share of folks with social anxiety and various forms of autism[2], it took all of a day before we were in another meeting with someone who, I think, pronounced "infeasible" as "in-THESE-able." A minor mistake, but he repeated it a solid thirty times and liked to really push that emphasis on the second syllable. We got out of the meeting and I asked for his number. "37"[0] he said. I was one off. It ended up becoming a weird sort of corporate meeting game that we did a few times a month over 17 years. It's a ridiculously easy habit to pick up, it turns out. I've been out of that job for years and I still do it. No real reason, any longer. I don't think less of people who don't have a solid command of public speaking -- as in, I'm not doing it for the purpose of feeling superior or being a d!ck and pointing it out to them. The only people that know I do this (other than readers of my comments on HN) are my kids and the guy who got me hooked.
[0] The exact number escapes me but it was a suspiciously random sounding number
[1] This guy marched to the beat of a different drummer. I have so many stories of outlandish claims he made that turned out to be absolutely true by this point that I should have taken him at his word. By this point he'd shown me a receipt indicating his bill was less than a dime for what must have been two carts worth of groceries (early 2000s), and it was only a dime because he bought something from the register to avoid a negative balance (a problem he's navigated in the past).
[2] Myself and (I suspect) my friend are diagnosed ASD as well.
That hypercorrection is ghastly.
Originally he'd take 2 minutes to get through his name and phone number on a voicemail, and a few months later you wouldn't even recognize him by how clear and concise he was.
https://youtube.com/shorts/FthRCwn1JuM?si=lC3eWAUI7sV-LL-r
A wearable speech coach would be awesome, though. Detect filler words and give you an alert on your HUD when it detects "uh" "uhm" etc.
If the filler words are excessive it would slow down the apparent rate of speech, but obviously not the real rate of speech, by definition, since we're only removing words with zero semantic value.
Ah, yes, the coupon cutters that would spend all of their free time trying to get a deal. But if they were happy doing it, then who am I to judge.
[0] In a lower-middle-class neighborhood.
Looking forward to videoconferences with filtered faces and speech that has been smoothed over with the occasional computer glitch, but people still prefer it.
Off the cuff I can picture some Australians taking it more nasally at the top of the palate sort of yee-ah (think Steve Irwin), a more neutral yeehr with a hint of final r (but more clipped and mono syllable than an American accent), or even a yair that might push as far as yuhhh (heading towards a sort of hybrid of Californian Valley Girl and the posh British accent used in American media).
Bit of an exploration of the evoking Australian accent here: https://amp.abc.net.au/article/103321146
But I recall reading that this is a deliberate affect used by those who work with nuclear material. Partly as a shibboleth, partly as a means of making the word easier to say quickly.
It came up because George W Bush would pronounce it “nucular” and that was given as the reason. All if my memory serves that is.
I’d bet that they love the foilage in fall, too.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nucular
But it's not something to be horrified by; it's no different from how we commonly pronounce "February" without the first "r", or "government" without the "n", or "Wednesday" flipping the "dne" to "nd".
What's even more interesting is that it's only in the context of weapons/energy. The same person will say "nuclear family" the way it's spelled.
But in the weapons/energy context, it's just a natural re-use of the suffix in "moleCULAR", "oCULAR", "cirCULAR". Technically wrong in terms of its derivation, but it feels entirely natural to say, and requires less tongue movement.
It's not due to a lack of education or anything. It's more like a regional dialect, where the region is nuclear weapons and energy.
I've never heard it as anything but Wends-day, but maybe everyone else is wrong.
What other way could you pronounce it?
https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&sca_esv=0...
...unless you're saying he pronounced the 'F' as a 'TH'?
That’s how I read it
I really want to check if it's drum or drummer, but will refrain and live in hope that it was a clever joke
It’s possible to mean it either way, or to hear it and interpret it either way.
The idea that people use this word as a subtle/unintentional insult to others' intelligence rather than as a synonym for "essentially"... I just don't know how people arrive at such ungenerous conclusions so confidently.
I find that's basically never the case and generally if they are playing some sort of status game, the entire conversation is condescending, so worrying about one normal phrase is pointless.
Funny enough, “ya know” was one of the main phrases. I hear that a lot from people in NJ, I’m curious if your co-worker was from NJ as well, or the general vicinity.
0 - in Protocol Independent Multicast Sparse-mode routing, an RP is the root of the shared tree of participants for a given multicast group. See RFC 2362.
1 - for an English speaker, anyway. I imagine a native French speaker could pick apart the way we pronounce rendezvous.
1) Saying something correctly but unnecessarily complicated - for example, when a project manager says, "We do not have financial resources for that," instead of simply, "We don't have money for that," when declining a team dinner (a CFO's report is another story).
2) Saying something incorrectly - for instance, "It is really flustrating."
I've started to dislike the latter more. The former involves people who at least use correct phrases, even if they're trying too hard to impress others. The latter indicates people who simply don't read.
To give an idea of how I see it as potentially useful, there are some frustrating events which leave a person in no doubt that there's nothing they can do to remedy the situation (or that they have no choice but to put a lot of work into fixing a situation which never should have arisen), while others might leave a person in a tizzy over what to do now.
I absolutely know when I'm doing it, and it's not a confusing/conflating of two words situation. I see it no different than when people say any new phrase like how people just say "bet" in a way that has absolutely nothing to do with the word's definition. At least what I'm doing still uses the meaning of the pormanteau's base words appropriately rather than just using a word randomly because it's hip
sometimes language has gaps. sometimes it's worth it to just invent a word to convey meaning.
"My friend and I."
EDIT: example:
On a somewhat-related note, my grandfather told me that while he was in Officer Candidate School in the Army, there would be someone assigned to ring a bell whenever a person who was leading a briefing or otherwise presenting faltered with an "oral pause" (uh, ummm, etc.) I don't know if this was a normal or ongoing practice.
0 - first one on this page https://kintronics.com/technical-jokes-cartoons-8/
We printed up bingo cards filled with buzzwords, products, trends, things we thought the analysis might say, etc. We charged $15 per card, all of which was pooled and given to the charity of the winner's choice. When the CEO caught on, he started matching the donations.
There was a reverse version of this played too. We voted in Slack for some weird word or phrase that the CEO or CFO had to say during the earnings calls. They were super awkward and totally unrelated, and the goal was they had to weasel the phrase in somehow. It was pretty funny.
(For someone else in the know, without giving away the company, do you remember any of the wacky phrases?)
- updog
- stegosaurus
- brat
- flabbergasted
- superbowl
- crouton
Reminds me of the old short story, I think it was called "The Club"?
The phrases from that company (late 90s) are now long-gone from my mind, mere flotsam on the subsequent sea of bullshit.
But later on I worked a lot with soldiers from the British Army and discovered to my delight that they also had some excellent phrases. Off the top of my head
Wolf closest to the sledge / Crocodile closest to the canoe = highest priority problem
Left and right of arc = the extreme ends of a spectrum of possible choices
Don't fight the white = in a test, answer the question rather than complain about it (in staff college exams, the question was on white paper, answer was a different coloured paper, apparently)
Interview without coffee = a dressing down from a senior officer
etc etc.
I used to take notes and just try to capture the buzzword onslaught. Here's an old notepad cut-and-paste from a single 90 minute meeting this guy was in:
We should sidebar
I’ll call an audible and order lunch
So maybe we’ll put that into a live fire exercise
We’re elbow deep now
I’m starting to ladder into goals and tactics
Let’s explore this for a second so we can put it in the parking lot
Let’s take a bio-break
It’s not on the top of my want-to-do list
I want to get back to some more basic block and tackle
If you look at it as crawl, walk, run. I mean I hate that metaphor, but we’re transitioning from crawl to walk
I have some suggestions around merchandising homepage content
I’ve already done concepting
It’s analytics with icebreaking on the social side
I’ll type up outputs and share
We’re potentially opening the aperture on expert interviews
Out of this decision comes wayfinding for that decision
I’m looking for the exponential in this
Alright, I think we can land it
So we had 2 pots. The meaner pot was internal to our own team, where we would bet on both how many users would connect to the webserver before it crashed, and then what the other team would blame as the fault. It was always ~3200 and it was almost always RAM.
One of us would sit in on their publicity events, and present the other team with live readouts on hardware usage. The server had umpteen processors with eleventy Jigahertz, and all the RAM that could fit in the chassis (~128GB from memory). 3000 odd users would connect simultaneously, RAM usage would spike to 2%, processor usage would spike to 3% and the website would crash. We would cash in on their pot as to the number of successful simultaneous connections. Then we would go back to our team, and cash in on users AND whatever they were blaming.
After which our IT managers would have their monthly duel where ours would send them a quote to build a better website and they would send us a strongly worded email about how they felt the hardware was the bottleneck.
Brilliant.
"Read between the tea leaves.”
- one of my favorites
A woman I worked with long ago was trying to tell her boss that something was "a whole new ballgame" but came out with "whole new ballpark." The boss didn't pick up on it, but after work she mentioned it to her husband, and "a whole new ballroom" became a family catchphrase.
There's actually a subreddit for these terms... can't remember atm.
“I have autism” is a better statement than “I’m autistic” because autism doesn’t define me.
Update we kept our practice a secret though, it wasn’t nice to point these things out to people.
A copy of the list ended with us, the family, and has come up during my grandfather's wake and a few times since then.
Absolutely agree that it might not be nice, but context depending it absolutely can be -- as well as a really touching legacy.
"All the sudden"?
Seems weird for the WSJ.
A tough conversation followed.
Let David Mitchell explain, in a totally non sarcastic way https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=om7O0MFkmpw
It's a side effect of stress/pressure/multi-tasking. It's not an indication of intelligence.
But alas! Nope.
That said, if I were going to start a Borg-themed band, Six of One would be a kick-ass name.
Clumsy expressions of socioeconomic aspirations go beyond language, of course. Take the infamously bad taste of the parvenu and the comical snobbery of the nouveau riche and those who ape them.
So I told them that my trick was to get them talking about their business straight out of the gate (because most people like talking about themselves at that level) and their stutter went away.
I feel like that's maybe more constructive approach.
That was one of my favorite groups of co-workers. Miss that crew!
Since we have two big issues that everyone knows and is thinking about but doesn't want to discuss or confront, only one of them can be the elephant in the room. The other must be in the closet.
It wasn’t until much later that I learned that the particular mistake this guy was prone to making was called a mondegreen, not a malapropism.
(The transcription of the dialogue itself contains an error, to wit, the use of "penhead" instead of "pinhead".)
"Coming down the pipe." instead of "Coming down the pike."
:-D
This makes me question Ford’s corporate effectiveness, and therefore their cars…
Perhaps if they paid attention this closely to market conditions and manufacturing innovations, Ford wouldn't have this embarrassing example of a corporate executive that is so out of touch.