I live in the US Midwest. Yes, it is true that if someone asks you casually "How are you?" they are not expecting your life story, and the waiter's question about "how's the food so far?" is generally not an invitation to give a three paragraph review of the food. But it is legitimately a time to ask for refills, and a clerk's question is legitimately a time to tell them about the bathroom being dirty or something. It may not be a close personal connection and you may not invite them to your son's graduation party, but it isn't quite the null, empty question this essay portrays, either. It's better than being ignored.

Fun hack: "How are you?", "What's up?", "Hey", etc., are all fungible. It is perfectly acceptable to answer "What's up?" with "Hey" or a question in return. Fun.