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> ...but I was lying to myself. Rounding friends up to drive 90 minutes then hop on light rail for a half hour before even getting in the vicinity of where you're going has a very real chilling effect on planning fun time.

1000%. I would complain about driving the 12 minutes just to get out of my subdivision (before moving into town). Just what you say, there's a "chilling effect" when everything you want to do is 30 mins away.

A big part of it is how you want to find friends.

If you have a “friend profile” and you want people to match it, a city is wonderful - more people, more matches.

Thing: all friends within 5 years of my age, similar jobs, education, etc. Go city! Or college maybe.

But if you’re old country or old rural and want to be friends with those around you a suburban or rural area can be fine. You end up making friends with the ten year old next door, and his parents, along with the retirees on the other side, etc.

>> my old friends and neighbors to point out that I could buy a 27-bedroom house on a 100 acre lot in the country for what I pay in rent in the city. They fail to realize that not having to drive two hours each way to have fun is worth the 35% premium in housing for me

Good point. There's no possible way to have fun in a 27-bedroom house on a 100 acre lot.

> give each paradigm a shot and decide what they like.

Hard agree. I think the article is right that most people haven't even come close to trying the lifestyle he's suggesting.