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You don't know what you are missing but to each their own i guess.

Got a proper chuckle, TU

There are way more bacteria in your mouth than on your genitals

I feel like invoking the zeroth law of thermodynamics here.

There is an equal amount of bacteria in your mouth and on my genitals.

… do you.. use a toilet paper roll for that?

Modified wooden toilet roller? Wow. Just wow.

I was shocked that this might have been a recent thread on fark, but the time stamps reassured that fark is part of the past still

It's still alive and well, unless you could demographics aging like South Korea

..how else would you possibly wipe them?