I don't have kids but my close friend does. One thing I noticed is his kids, 10 and 8, barely touch phones or play video games. I asked him about it and if they instated any kind of ban or limitation and he said no.

The key takeaway is they sped a lot of time with their kids, discipline them, give them chores on a schedule and they are allowed to explore hobbies. My friends are social people and invite neighbors to parties they host which brings the neighborhood kids together. They spend time with family, who also have kids, and go on small trips like a car ride upstate or amusement park for a day. This constant interaction keeps them occupied with real world activities and socialization which builds their self worth and place in life.

Idle kids are bored kids and that boredom is a vacuum easily filled by screens.