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Let's Windowsify it.

"Welcome to your Volvo, let's get started"

"Please wait while we prepare your car!"

"Something went wrong."

If microsoft built cars (joke) (2004)

Possibly better reference:

"If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon"

Lol, a blast from the past. "You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off." Not too far from the current state of things.

Arch Linux car would just be a pallet of raw materials with a link to a wiki.

Add one more to that: put the car in the garage with a full tank to find out it has no gas when you take it out for a spin a week later.