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Because nobody would know about it unless you told them for some reason

That might fall under the “unethical” part of my question. Could “probably” get away with it if done carefully, but I’d rather be fully in compliance.

Why would self-hosting for privacy reasons be unethical just because the query would be subject to subpoena in principle?

If you have records, and the discovery is worded in a way that covers the records you have, then deleting or not producing them would be unethical.

More importantly, I’d rather use SOTA models over self-hosted ones if possible.

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